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Im an aspiring author. Please judge small section of my story?
These are metaphors from actual GCSE essays

The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a
bowling ball wouldn't.

McMurphy fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a paper bag
filled with vegetable soup.

Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.

Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the
centre.

Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.

The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the full stop after
the Dr. on a Dr Pepper can.

John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who
had also never met.

The thunder was ominous sounding, much like the sound of a thin
sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a
play.

The door had been forced, as forced as the dialogue during the
interview portion of Family Fortunes.

The plan was simple, like my brother Phil. But unlike Phil, this
plan just might work.

The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not
eating for a while.

He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck either,
but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a
land mine or something.

She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog
makes just before it throws up.

It came down the stairs looking very much like something no one
had ever seen before.

The knife was as sharp as the tone used by Glenda Jackson MP in
her first of several points of parliamentary procedure made to
Robin Cook MP,Leader of the House of Commons, in the House
Judiciary Committee hearings on the suspension of Keith Vaz MP.

The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender
leg behind her, like a dog at a lamppost.

The dandelion swayed in the gentle breeze like an oscillating
electric fan set on medium.

He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells,
as if she were a dustcart reversing.

She was as easy as the Daily Star crossword.

She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was
room-temperature British beef.

She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.


It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it
to the wall.


---------------------------
lol i found them funny how bout u?


Metaphors in english essays.........?
i was planning to get my hair relaxed, but things fell through, and now im stuck with curly hair until november. i love my curls...they look like this...http://www.saidaonline.com/en/newsgfx/curly%20hair-saidaonline.jpg
except frizzier

i had to get a lot of my hair cut off because it was destroyed from straightening it. now when its curly, it only goes a little below my jawline, and it is tent shaped.

its too short to wear it down.

does anyone have any good updo hairstyles for curly hair i can use during swim season? im willing to spend about a half hour on my hair in the morning, and a half hour at night if it needs to be blow dried. any cute ideas for buns or a french braid or something? i don't want a ponytail, because it will be so short and poofy. i don't want cornrows.

PICTURES OR HOW-TO VIDEOS PLEASE!!!!

additional question: my hair is shoulder length when straight, plus its kinda thin. if i blow dry it at night so its not smooth but somewhat straight, how long do you think it will take to straighten it with a straightener in the morning? i have a professional infra shine striaghtener and can adjust the heat up to 400 degrees. im willing to straighten it on occasion if it doesn't take more than 30 mins in the morning.


hairstyles for swim season?
I tried getting up off the couch yesterday like I usually do, then I fell back down because my arm had begun to hurt horribly. Its my ulna but more around my elbow where the arm is bigger. It hurts to move it, pick things up, etc. What should I do? What could I possible have?I tried getting up yesterday like I usually do, then I fell back down because my arm had begun to hurt horribly. Its my ulna but more around my elbow where the arm is bigger. It hurts to move it, pick things up, etc. What should I do? What could I possible have?Getting up from the couch not outta my bed. lol


My arm hurts so BAD!!!!! Please help.?
Agricultural Signature

The river slithers along the complete vein
Of current down the face of the world
Meandering quietly by
It’s flow amounting to worthless accounts of data

The current diverge circles
And communicates to wave floating by signatures in ripples
Entropy assuming
To mask the siltstone engaging in transmitting work

Wires connect to the still reflection
Draining water by immersion
In form mirrored flesh erected to act
Emerging in the revolution computed

Coming around the river works itself into the ocean
Dilating the waters in its live blood
From a stone fall at the feet of the sky
Growing free in the representations of selection

The waves crash upon the edge of time
On a shore of sands rippling in a cosmic tide
Atomic ghosts connecting the instruction parallels
Blessing the stars twinkling viral superscalar microprocessors


What do you think of my poem?
when i was in class 11 th i started loving a girl .she was very b'ful.she was head girl of our school.till before i hv never fallen in love with anyone.i had affections but not love..i dont know what happened to me but i started loving her...why..i myself dont know...she was so innocent.. it was the first day of my 11 th class when i first time talked 2 her..after that i was in search of all the cause for which i cud talk 2 her.. she was much silent..she didn't spoke much.not 2 anyone. i dont knew what happened 2 me but my luv.. grew desperately for her.. i cant live a single moment without thinking of her..and she never gave me any response.i wanted 2 talk 2 her and share my feelings but she never responded.i never did any thing wrong.. nor i went on behind her everytime.. but i only kept looking her..she did n't liked that..everyone in the class knew that i was having crush on her..time passed.. in the whole year i only got few chances 2 talk 2 her.i gave my slam 2 her..firstly she refused but later she took it..and filled it with very common answers as if filling a useless form..i was hurt ..by it.. she never took me seriously..i wanted that she shud b my frnd.. i dont want 2 loose her...now we reached in class 12...only once just 4 periods i got a chance to sit beside her row..that hours are memorable to me.we chatted a little.i was very happy.. i cant express it.. as the time passed summer holidays came..i felt very sad just by thinking that 2 months i will not b able 2 see her..i was really very sad.. and on last day i said in frustration..i dont know...she was coming after school got over... i stopped her and said that.. i wanted 2 tell her.. sm thng..i said that : will u b my friend.. she said...we are already frnds .. and her face went down..i dont know.. what she thought was in my mind...that was the biggest mistake of my life...after 5 days she talked 2 me and said : pz... dont talk to me now onwards ..i dont want 2 talk to u. i was lost...what hppnd...infact i said sorry 2 her nearly 5 or 6 times for what i did..she said that she forgive me... but ..wh did she said so... her lips were not allowing her 2 speak such words.. i cud see it.her heart didn't wanted...but mind ways she said slowly.. that pinched me so much...i was in tears...i came home..kept thinking whole night...i cant afford 2 loose her..and what had happnd... i wantd 2 b her frnd and what happnd....my life was lost... her those words i still remember.......i obeyed what she said..coz.. i dont want to hurt her...every day early morning school ..i just went to see her..... just by seeing her ...i cud understand that she is happy.i cant imagine a day without seeing her..but i dont have the courage to go and talk her now.i got to know by my frnds that someone told wrong things to her about me....and that s why she was upset..iu wanted that one day she will come to know the thruth but that day never came..school came 2 end... farewell day i wanted to talk 2 her but my legs cudnt even walk up to her...i was afraid that she is so happy and my presence will make her sad... well board exams were over.....26 march 2006 last paper was hindi...xam khatm ho gaya tha...he...taht was the last time..i saw her...i looked her for 1 minute...coz.. i knew that know i dont know when i will get chance 2 see her...she was not looking 2 wards me.. days passed my tears never stopped...i prayed 2 god desperately...ke wo mujhe mil jaye...one thing i knew that she was muslim so she never got permissions 2 go for coachings to far places..as most girl do in lucknow..so i had no chance 2 see her ...destiny was not with me.. now i got admission in enggineering ..i had 2 leave lucknow..and her .. this thought only..shivered me...but that time also passed .....till now 3 years have passed i am now in 4 th year.... mere prayers se... love se kuch nahi hua...i lost everything why.... after 2 years i scrap her on orkut but she never replied.. she had even not added me in frnds list.after 2006 i searched for her on the net... but she had no account any where... she started usking orkut in 2008....there was no way to talk 2 her...i cant call her also... now 2009...i am now a cool person.. when i remember those days...ifeel very sad... and tears roll down..i only wish her happy bday....every year...on internet.... and in return... she only says thanks...


now u telll what should i do... should i love such a girl... who doesnt understand about feelings


i loved a girl ..but i couldnt tell her...?
It's due tomorrow! It has to be about 2500 words, so far its like 700. I kind of have an idea but I'm not sure what exactly should happen next..
Here is the story so far...

“I hate you, mummy! I hate you, I hate you, I HATE YOUUU!”
While the first three exclamations were punctuated quickly- a glacial satanic chant- I found the last time she said it the most satisfying. It was a high-pitched wail of surrender, of resignation. She would not be getting the Malibu Beach Deluxe Barbie 2000 and she damn well knew it. Oh! That last futile attempt! How it sent a shiver of pleasure throughout my black soul. Everyone in the toy store stared at her- children gaping and pointing- the older ones laughing or rolling their eyes. Of course, I looked on in blissful pride, an admiration that could only be accurately described as fatherly. Her shiny brown eyes turned a dull scarlet as her anger grew. This was her communicating with me, signalling her accessibility. Of course, nobody else could see this physical change. They just saw an angry, little girl. A spoilt brat. Cute, almost. Only I, leaning on the wooden rocking horse, witnessed the true shift in her spirit. I decided to let the darkness nurture her a little more. Besides, this was a delightful little performance and I did not wish it to end anytime soon. The embarrassed mother stroked her daughter’s white-blonde hair in a vain effort to console.
“Honey, you must be tired,” she cooed. “Mummy’s been dragging you around all day, I’m sorry. But we’re shopping for your brother, not you sweetheart. It’s Blake’s birthday on Sunday. Don’t you want him to get a nice present? And then, when it’s your birthday, you can have any Barbie you want…”

This impertinent mother! How dare she meddle with the dutiful callings of my dear children? Thankfully, this little sprite was devoted to me and resolute in her anger.
“It’s not faaair,” she wailed. “Blake gets everything!”

She was at the height of her hysteria. Her eyes were blazing out to me now- yearning for my infringement. I took the form of a cold wind and blew into her swiftly. The mother shuddered and took her hand off her daughter’s head as soon as I entered her.
“Honey?”

With a great roar, I picked up the woman and threw her down the aisle, knocking the plastic doll boxes off their shelves. There was a piercing scream, and suddenly everyone was running and shouting. Growling and striding through the store, I remained constant amidst the chaos. The way I have always been. A solid pillar standing amongst man’s mistakes. A steel ship that does not sink regardless of how many waves are thrown mercilessly at its very neck. You may be wondering who I am. You needn’t. You have heard about me countless times before, whether it be in your school, your church or any other institution that undoubtedly governs your life. I am one of the main characters in that fat, pathetic book that you clutch to your chest in your darkest hour.
And what, may you ask, was my business lurking in a toy store (of all sinister places!) in the middle of a Saturday afternoon? My reply is that Yahweh isn’t the only one who can strike up a kinship with the little ones. I am generous in calling it a kinship, however, as most children are quite bored with him I’m afraid. ‘Suffer the little children to come unto me.’ You can try, old friend, you can try.
Many years have I seen the poor creatures falling asleep in church, blasting their metal records, trying to get away from the tired nature of it all. I, above anything else, am their savior. Rather than put the children down, I wish to raise them up on pedestals and adorn their playful hooves with the golden shoes of supremacy. With my help, they can rise above the poisonous, older generation. I tried with that lot, I really did. But the brainwashing of my opponent had engraved a sickening message into their soft skulls, one that even I had trouble trying to erase. I could not convince those humans that they were not powerless. That bountiful ability lay unused in the depths of their beings.
The children however! Those wonderful children. They could easily be manipulated through simple possession. Have you not read the paper lately? Many children are being diagnosed with extreme behaviour disorders. It is not a disorder, but rather a renewal of the order that existed thousands of years ago.
Let us return to the present moment in which I am empowering the soul of a human girl who has been taught her whole life to depend on her mother.


Help me with an ending for my short story?
When we met he had a gf and I was going thru a divorce. We were friends for around 6-7 months. He broke up with gf and wanted to start dating me. Divorce was final but I avoided him for a couple of months knowing he wasn't over the gf. He was persistent though and when I saw him again he said he knew this was the right thing and he'd stopped drinking! We dated for almost a year. Never had an argument or an unkind word between us. Laughed constantly. Through out the time that I knew him I felt that he wanted to make me emotional. He'd tell me about the spinner he tried to make eye contact with at the bar. Go to Atlanta for 3 days without calling, etc. It wasn't a big deal to me and I trusted him and figured he was having fun with his friend. I fell for this man in a big way. I would have fought for him, just didn't want to fight with him. We'd go swimming in the middle of the night, sit in a hot tub for an hour or so, then go get coffee and to the park at daylight to fly model airplanes. I met a couple of his friends. He met some of my family and he had even mentioned to me that I'd have medical if I moved in with him. A month later his mother died and 3 days after he came over and broke up with me. Said that I cared more for him than he did me and I was too good a person and he didn't want to hurt me more later. I told him he was a good man and that I hoped he'd find everything he wanted in life because he deserved it. Then he broke down and cried. I told him don't worry about it, I'd be alright. 4 days later my Dad died. He was supposed to change my oil while we were dating but never got around to it, so I called to ask if he could. My Dad was being buried out of state and I didn't want to put the miles.... Anyway after he changed the oil, he kissed me (no, he KISSED me! the kind you never forget) and I pushed him away and he cried again. I told him that this was what he wanted and left. This man showed up in my hangouts every week or two for a year and a half and invited me to go home with him. I didn't go for a long time but finally did and he told me that he never cared about me and that I was just a good lay! I left immediately and never went back again. Yet he still continued to come around and run off anyone that seemed to want to get close to me, tried to make me jealous, etc. I just ignored him. Even after he got a gf, he would come into the restaurant with her and get up to go to the bathroom and flirt with me and signal me to call him behind her back. I never called him. He had my number. When I run into him he still acts hostile toward me.
What did I do that hurt him?? Why did he become so hostile months after he broke up with me when we had never had problems before? This has never made sense to me.But I never wanted to hurt him. I feel like I must have for him to have lashed out at me the way he did, telling me he didn't care and ...


I need to know why he got angry with me when I gave him everything he asked for including freedom?
me and friend katie were walking in the woods and she collapsed! i dont know what happened or why but she stopped breathing and then when i tryed to move her she slipped and fell down this ledge and into the river. i just ran i left her.. her parents called to my house looking for her! i told them she was at beckys her other friend! shes going to get the blame! i dont know if she actually dead but she must be drowned by now its been hours! what do i do?


Im freaking out what should i do?
My BF's son has slept with him all his life. He is now 3.5yrs old. Although its comforting on all parties to have his son present - it is a real detriment to many different things having him there, also. *This also applies to him taking naps*
I.E.-
- a barrier on intimacy,
-uncomfortable, now, (namely for me) as he sleeps practically "attached" to me with his knees/feet in my back, neck.(and he's strong too, so when he grinds them into me it really hurts.
-He sleeps practically ON my head. On all my hair. All 40lbs rolling around on all my hair & I can't move my head.
-He won't fall asleep without playing with my hair - At 2yrs it was nice. At 3yrs, he pulls, tugs, flips, even chews, etc...it's uncomfortable.

(even if I move/reposition him...he quickly finds his way back to me no matter where in the bed I may move)

We brought his bed into the bedroom nearly a year ago. It's RIGHT next to the big bed. So, if he's in his bed....& one of us is sleeping near the edge of the big bed; it's like he's still in the same bed.
This is not good enough for him. He will scream & cry. And he will do it for hours until you let him back in bed.
My BF talks about weaning him into his own bed all the time - but really shows no effort in doing so.
And from personal experience (I co-slept with my mom till I was 11) it's not a matter of being scared....(if he wakes up & we're not there he gets up, goes down stairs, finds us...then freaks out. In laments terms...he just super P.O.'d that we're not sleeping when he is. SO we have to go back upstairs and lay there for upwards of an hour-2hrs. while he falls back asleep.If he were scared, he'd stay upstairs & cry like when he was 1.5/2yrs.) he simply refuses to sleep alone - because he doesn't want to...
So, I tell him that the longer he lets this continue - the harder it's going to be on both of them to get him to sleep on his own. Every kid is different - but I'm speaking from experience.
Now, he's going to law school soon.....and he's not going to be able to set aside the possible 4hrs each night to deal with this.
I try to explain to him he needs to get a start on this BEFORE he starts law school - because it could seriously affect his performance.

If it were me, alone dealing with it - it would have been rectified or heavily in the process by now. (not that I don't enjoy the little guys company) But, as I am NOT the true parent, I often step back and let him do things his way...


Any advice regarding similar situations would be much appreciated.
Thanks so much =)


When did you stop co-sleeping with your child?
my moh has shoulder length hair and i need to find some pic of really cool hairstyles. i am not having a traditional wedding and i don't want her hair to be formal. i want something that is stylish and not slicked back but also not just down with curls since we are getting married in key west the humidity will make her hair fall. any suggestions or pics would be so helpful!! thanks again